Scandal "You’re Ornamental, Not Functional"

Yolanda 12 Comments
Image courtesy of ABC
It’s been a couple of weeks since one of my favorite shows SCANDAL had it’s season premiere, but there was a phrase in that episode that has really stuck with me. The scene in which President Grant (Tony Goldwyn) and the first lady (Bellamy Young) were arguing after a press conference in which she over stepped her boundaries. “Your opinion doesn’t matter,” the president said. “You’re the first lady. Your job is to plant gardens and decorate rooms and let them blog about your clothes. You’re ornamental, not functional.” 


“You’re ornamental, not functional” really resonated with me, it made me sit back and evaluate my role in the lives of my loved ones, friends and acquaintances and their roles in mines. I have come to realize that I give far too much weight to the length of time someone has been in my life vs. the value they are currently bringing to my life and I to theirs. And I therefore have allowed relationships to linger far longer than they need to. 

That is not to say that I feel that my relationships are all about what I can get out of them. It’s important that I remember that sometimes I may meet someone in order to be a blessing or a positive influence on their life, and that I  may not benefit from their presence in any significant way. If neither party is benefiting from a relationship be it love, friendship, emotional or support what is the point of putting my energy and time into it. I say there is no point and my energy will be better geared towards other more “functional” relationships in my life. 

I realize Scandal is a television show and should be viewed as entertainment, but I believe that a lesson can be learned or a gentle reminder can come from anywhere. So with all that said I am working on playing a more functional role in the lives of those I value and being more aware of those who are merely ornamental in mines. 

Image courtesy of ABC


Are you playing an ornamental role in someones life? Is there someone in you life who is merely ornamental?

12 Comments

  1. I love this show as well, and although I don’t remember that quote but you’re right– we have to evaluate and prune our relationships. It doesn’t hurt to go through your phone at least once a year and clear the clutter.

    P.S. – Found this blog for #NaBloPoMo on BlogHer!

  2. I read this…early this morning at my 4:30am Unexpected Beauty reading time and couldn’t comment from my phone so I am back because this topic is just that important. Believe it or not about 10 years ago, I started to realize and understand that people are in your life for a “reason, season, or a lifetime” and tried not to worry so much about those that were just taking from me and not giving anything. I always tried to hold on to every relationship and I had to realize that every relationship isn’t going to be lifetime, people change and grow and so do your needs. However 10 years later I am still working on this because again I find myself looking at friendships and realizing that some of them are so one sided. I only hear from these people when they need or want something, never to they call to just chat or check in to see how I am doing. I know people are busy,and have things going on in their life…so it’s not like oh if I haven’t heard from you in “X” amount of time, that I am cutting you off. However, I am learning now, not to spread myself so thin, and will focus my love and energy more on relationships that I find to be genuine.

  3. I love this show. Hearing Fitz say that made me cringe inside, though, because it was just so cruel in that moment!

    But I love this idea that we should evaluate the relationships in our lives for who brings us value versus who we keep around because we just keep them around. It’s hard to let go of relationships that are no longer functional/just ornamental, but as I get older I know I’d rather have the working relationships that bring quality to my life than those that are just for quantity’s sake.

  4. Thanks Daree for stopping bye! I am just working on mentally clearing people out, because if I cleared my phone I wouldn’t know which calls NOT to answer. LOL Good luck with NaBloPoMo!!!

  5. Thank you Daphne for such a thoughtful comment. I in know way expect this to be easy, but I think just looking at the relationships for what they are instead of what they where or what I want them to be will help to relieve some un due stress.

  6. That is exactly why it stuck with me, the harshness of his statement. I made my husband (who isn’t a fan of the show) watch the whole episode just so he can hear that statement.

  9. I also think the role you may play in someone’s life or they in yours can be alternating between the two at times. I have learned that a relationship fizzing out doesn’t mean that there can’t be a meaningful and welcome reconnection in the future.

  10. I totally agree with you. I have finally figured out that people don’t have to be in your life too long or I in anyone else’s life to make an impact. I am learning to learn what I can from people while they are around even if that lesson is that that they aren’t meant to be there. I love scandal btw.

  11. YES! I caught that phrase, too. I think I said “No he DI’INT!” or something to that effect…Thankfully no, I am no one’s ornament. There are many messages in mere tv shows. You are on point with this one. XOXO

  12. Testing! It seems I can comment from home! Hmmmm. I might need to look into this.

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